Gifts and Thank You Notes-Always a Dilemma

We are now in the midst of the biggest gift giving season of the year. We are all excited about being able to give a special gift, carefully selected for someone. And, we are all excited about receiving something special as well. But nothing matches the excitement we see on our children's and grandchildren's faces when being given a gift, especially one that they know is exactly what they want. Whether the gift comes from Santa, mom or dad, a grandparent, or someone else, there are some social skills conventions that address gift receiving that your kids can practice now.

The general rule of thumb is if a gift is given in person and the person is thanked for it at that time, that thanks is sufficient. If a gift is shipped or mailed, the person will want to know that it was received. Therefore, some kind of acknowledgment is appropriate. Gifts among immediate or close family members are usually exempt from a thank you note. For all other situations, a hand-written thank you shows your good manners and social competency.

Most kids (and even adults) balk at being asked to write thank you notes. Keep in mind, that this training will come in handy when they have a job interview and will need to write a note to the interviewer.

In our high tech society, email, text, and phones have rendered the hand-written thank you note almost obsolete. Ask your kids to act out the following poem. It may just encourage them to write that note. Even young children can draw a picture and tell you what to write.

EMAIL OR SNAIL MAIL
Part 1
Giving gifts is fun to do
And making them is, too
Presents and gifts show others you care
I like getting them, don't you?

Part 2
Mom says thank you notes are right
For gifts and favors, too
Who says a note makes a kid polite?
I don't like writing them, do you?

Part 3
"Thank you so much"
"How thoughtful of you"
I love it and can't wait to use it"
Are some of the things that you can say
Never say "Yuk" and refuse it

Part 4
My friends send thanks by email
Or simply call by phone
If I send thanks by snail mail
I'll be writing all alone

Part 5
I like doing what's right
Notes could be fun, too
I want to be a kid who's polite
If I write them, won't you?